So, Ru is 5 now. I remember when he was just a baby etc. No seriously though. FIVE. What? How even. Without thinking things through we told him he could invite like eight of his mates to our place for a party. The not-thinking-through bit was because kids his age come to parties with at least one parent, and usually a 3-year-old sibling, and sometimes a 1-year-old sibling too. We had a guestlist of 45 in the end. If we didn’t have MaryJane to organise, cook, serve and clean everything, I tell you what, we would’ve been stuffed.
We hired a guy called Goatee Toni to provide the entertainment. Though his name has slightly creepy connotations (just to me?) his show didn’t contain any inappropriate flashing. Or anything to do with goats, or pathetic chin beards. He brought along a bunch of small reptiles for the kids to touch. When we told Ru a wildlife guy was coming, he asked if he was bringing a baby leopard and was reasonably disappointed when we crushed that giant dream. Nonetheless he and his mates had a ball with the slightly less exotic animals who did come.
Our tiny, tiny frontyard before the insanity.
Motherfucking snakes in the yard!
Strangling MaryJane with a cornsnake for failing to change our sheets more often than every two days.
And this is for only mopping three times a week.
And this is for not folding my undies uniformly enough (yes she folds our jox).
Zadie’s best mate, Isabella.
Rosie the tarantula.
At first the kids ran away and the adults shrieked – only Joel would touch it.
But then 3-year-old Isabella did this, and everyone was shamed into having a go.
GET IT OFF!
Awesome massive bronze-and-blue-striped bluetongue.
I’ve never seen one so big in Vic!
